Beating Cancer in Heels: When did relaxing become so hard?

As a young adult, relaxing should be something that is pretty simple to do. In fact, you should be relaxing as much as possible in the most spontaneous and creative ways.

However, when you are diagnosed with a life-threatening illness, relaxing can seem like a thing of the past. Trying to figure out how to do so can also feel like an overwhelming thought process when your thoughts are filled with fear and anxiety.

You might look at your peers who are in a bubble of blissfulness without a worry in the world and think to yourself, why can’t that be me? Well, it CAN be you! It might be different but you will have the deepest appreciation for it and that is when you will relax.

Let me share a story with you. Before I started my treatments, I went to the Jersey Shore with some of my friends but not to party like the cast of the MTV television show.

Since my life had just gotten flipped and turned upside down, getting out of New York sounded like a relaxing and fun day. The sun was bright and the air felt like a warm blanket over my skin, which is GREAT for me because I am always cold.

The second my wedged beige heels touched the Jersey ground, the rollercoaster of emotions began. At one moment, I found myself getting upset at my friends for being glued to their phones and at another the cancer anxiety started.

Right away, I found myself enjoying less and PRETENDING more. I was starting to believe I would no longer find even a minute of relaxation.

Looking back on my day of “spontaneous relaxation” at the shore, there were moments that I was happy and relaxed. Those rare moments were the only times I was being GRATEFUL and PRESENT. When I let my thoughts get the best of me, it took away from my day. It is understandably difficult for what I was facing, but if I knew then what I know now I would’ve TRULY enjoyed that day.

So, Coachee, let’s get you smiling and relaxing!

TFAR Model- Thoughts->Feelings->Actions->Results

The above model shows how much your thoughts affect you.

When trying to RELAX ask yourself…

What can I do if my thoughts take away from the present moment?

Tip: wear a bracelet or something on your hand that is a personal reminder to keep present.

Empowerment: If you are focused on the future and the past, you are not rooted in reality. Keep it REAL, Coachee!

How do I practice gratitude?

Ask yourself…

What are three things I am grateful for in this exact moment?

Tip: Share your gratitude with someone they might need to hear it too.

Empowerment: I am in charge of how I feel and today I choose PEACE of MIND.

Inspiration for the week: Look up Gabby Bernstein, she has overcome her own health battles in life and is now a certified Kundalini yoga and meditation teacher.

Her books have help and inspired many including myself.

Calming sentence of the week: I cannot control yesterday or tomorrow. I can only control this present moment.

That’s it for today, Coachee! Stay tuned for more tips from your Life Coach Marlena!

If you are interested in being coached one on one please contact me at Marlena@MarlenaLC.com. You can also follow me on Facebook, Marlena Ortiz.